Archive for the Funny Sayings Quotes Category

Funny Sayings Quotes 18

A penny saved is ridiculous. I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers. Remember: Don't Insult the Alligator till after you cross the river. Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and y

Funny Sayings Quotes 17

All generalizations are false, including this one. How do you get a Kleenex to dance? Put a little boogy in it! What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? Polaroids. What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? An offer you can't understand

Funny Sayings Quotes 16

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. Gene Police: You!! Out Of The Pool! You know the speed of light;so what is the speed of dark ? Money doesn't make you happy. I now have $50 million but I was

Funny Sayings Quotes 15

Ideas don't stay in some minds very long because they don't like solitary confinement. Whatever it is -- I didn't do it! "Fragile. Do not drop." -- Posted on a Boeing 757 Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'? My advice to you is

Funny Sayings Quotes 14

"Insurance is like marriage. You pay, pay, pay, and you never get anything back." - Al Bundy He's so lazy that if there were work in bed, he would rather sleep on the floor. - Paddy O'Dea Car service: If it ain't broke, we'll break it. In God we trust; all other

Funny Sayings Quotes 13

Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film. There are three sides of an argument -- your side, my side and the right side. If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button. I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervou

Funny Sayings Quotes 12

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. Lily Tomlin I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants. A. Whitney Brown Guys: No Shirt, No Service - Gals: No Shirt, No Charge How Many Roads Must A Man Walk Dow

Funny Sayings Quotes 11

He who laughs last didn't get it. "Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together." When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's re

Funny Sayings Quotes 10

If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in her way. Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong and disposable. - Mrs. White, (Clue 1985) A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. Everyone is entitled to their own opinio

Funny Sayings Quotes 9

I could've eaten Alphabits and crapped out a better essay!! Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from. The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory. What do you mean, my birth certificate

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